Kinds of relationship issues
Besides having relationship issues with a partner, some also have relationship issues with family members, co-workers, friends, church members, bosses, neighbors, etc.
People having relationship issues might look for marriage counseling and want to talk to a couples’ therapist. Prenuptial couples may benefit from premarital counseling.
Couples (before and after marriage) come to me when they have either exhausted their communication skills and still frustrated with where the relationships are.
They might be having issues of trust, intimacy, and need help (re-)building the relationship they dream/want.
Blended Families or Divorced parents have an additional set of stresses they have to deal with.
At times, there are a history of trauma and guilt. Other times, there are stresses related to their (sometimes adult) children.
Couples therapy helps these individuals to explore and understand the causal relationship between their (and their children) behaviors and the situation they lived.
Exploring and analyzing one’s thoughts believes, and feelings, help the other partner to understand this partner and find ways to be on the same page, or at least understand one another.
I use Gottman therapy and other psychodynamic techniques when treating married couples.
Signs and symptoms of relationship issues
Here are some of the issues people encounter in their relationships:
- Unable to communicate thoughts and feelings
- Lack of trust
- Issues with intimacy and sex
- Lack of respect
- Lack of support
- Financial issues
- Family conflicts
- In-laws issues
- Blended family issues
- Parenting differences
- Issues with children and adult children
- Not building a healthy/positive future
- Staying in the past
- Having affairs/cheating
- Keeping secrets (affairs, alcoholism, financial issues, drug use, past, etc.)
- Anger, violence, arguments
How I treat patients with relationship issues
I use techniques from Gottman therapy and emotion-focused therapy that has been proven over and over in research to be the most effective at helping couples overcome their issues.
Through my training in various methods, you can be sure we’ll have a tool to help you through whatever unique challenges are present in your relationship.
Typical outcomes of relationship issues treatment
After completing treatment, patients can expect:
- Moving to a healthier level of relationship
- May need to create a NEW type of relationship
- Higher levels of commitment
- Regaining trust
- Improve/create intimacy
- Better their sex life
FAQ about relationship treatment
Yes. However, if the issue is within the relationship and not with the individual, it is highly recommended that the couple attend sessions together. The first step for a better relationship is having both parties invested in getting into a better/ new type of relationship.
The duration of treatment will depend on the level of the couple's conflicts. It is indicated for couples to attend sessions weekly for a couple of months at first. The treatment plan will be specific for each couple.
At the beginning of treatment, couples will attend sessions weekly, until all the negative symptoms have been resolved. When we move to build the “positive bank” in your relationship, the sessions might be attended every other week then.
It depends. Each person has their own set of beliefs that come from their family, their formation, and their temperament. Some people may be able to forgive and move on, while others may keep the resentment for long time. Either way, it is necessary to find out why the partner left the relationship (temporarily), why they both want to continue in this relationship, and if they are committed to try make this work.
Temporarily. At times, individuals keep secrets (affairs, alcoholism, financial issues, drug use, past, etc.) from their partners, but it has been found that secrets are damaging for maintaining a healthy relationship. I might keep a secret for a couple of weeks, with the understanding that the secret will be out soon. I will help the partner keeping the secret to come up with statements and learn how to communicate the difficult talk. People tend to keep secrets when they are afraid of rejection or reaction from their partners. Being in therapy provides a safe environment and tools to help bring about the secrets to partners.
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“Dr. Dove was very profound and good at her job. I have recommended other people to [her] office due to my pleasure and happiness.”
(Male, divorced, 50’s – Individual and Couple’s therapy)
“I have had many therapists, but I feel Dr. Rosana has been the best fit.”
(Female, married, LGBT, 30’s – Couple’s therapy)